Tuesday, May 29, 2012

What I've Learned

Barrage has been done now for a little over three weeks. I've given a lot of thought to processing what the last four years of my life entailed, and have found that it really just becomes an exercise in me daydreaming about hilarious memories. 

One thing I did, however, has turned out to be fruitful. Because I have a bad memory for certain things, I decided on this last bit of tour to try to write down everything I'd learned from Barrage -- some things are musical lessons, some are life lessons, and others are just views I've developed. I'm choosing to presenting them in the format of my favorite feature in Esquire magazine called "What I've Learned," in which quotes from an interview with someone (usually a public figure of some sort) are just printed on the page. I'm always intrigued by things these people have to say and usually find myself pondering them for some time after.

My actual list turned out to be much longer, but here are some things I found surprising, relevant, useful, or important to me in retrospect. After four years being lucky enough to live my childhood dream and travel the world with Barrage, the following is:

What I've Learned

Good music is good music. Period.

Fiddling and classical music aren’t that different when you realize, technically, they’re both based on how you use the bow to feel the music.

If I’m on stage and you’re in the first handful of rows, odds are good I can see you covering your mouth, whispering to your neighbor, and pointing to myself or a colleague on stage.

The United States really are as diverse as the media attempts to portray.

Everyone should experience trying to actually communicate with someone who doesn’t speak the same language. There’s nothing quite like it.

Humans are humans. When it comes down to it, you probably have a lot more in common with people on the other side of the world than you think you do.

Amsterdam is so, so, so much more than the Red Light District.

Remember: you’re not the only person who dislikes traveling through airports. Be kind. Chill out.

Early morning flights: window. All other flights: aisle.

There are two kinds of people: those who choose to follow the rules about carry-ons and those who don’t. Don’t be the latter. (I’m looking at you, people on full flights who put both of your carry-ons in the overhead!)

There’s something about driving a car which wrongly allows people to feel entitled: if you’ve cut off other drivers (either intentionally or accidentally), then you have no place to judge drivers for cutting off you.

Not all La Quintas are created equal.

American hotels don’t understand breakfast.

Hanger (hunger + anger) is very real.

No matter how good your mom’s recipe, if I ever have another lasagna it will be too soon.

There is an art to being agreeable.

Maturity is relative and can be mutually exclusive with age. Whatever your age, you can be as mature or as immature as you choose.

Seventy-six-year-olds can teach you lots of lessons; so, too, can seventy six-year-olds.

Actively knowing a teacher or mentor supports you builds confidence that is difficult to create on your own.

If you’re a performer, learn how to bow properly: bend at the waist, look at your feet, and don’t do it apologetically. And please, for your sake and the audience’s, smile. We’re all here to have a good time, right?

The point of the arts is to enrich the lives of others. Classical music hasn’t lost its ability to do this, pop music is just doing a better job of it. If you’re a classical musician, stop making excuses.

You never know when someone you meet as a young musician will be in a place to judge you when you’re older. How you act now affects how you are treated later. Your reputation, positive or negative, will precede you.

If your parents didn’t make you start an instrument, you probably started because you thought it looked fun. Too many music teachers have lost sight of this. 

A great rule for life, but a better rule for performers: you have to give to get. Audiences, whether or not they are actively aware of it, sense when performers aren’t giving and respond accordingly.

Giving your all requires more effort than most think.

You must give respect to get respect. 

While being the best is great, the only prerequisite for success is hard work.

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Of the few German words I know, only one really matters.

I wasn't planning on blogging today. 

Really, I wasn't even thinking about blogging until sometime after our last show on Sunday. Maybe on next Wednesday, or something, after I'd settled in back home and started to process this giant, indescribable bundle of feelings that has begun to slowly tangle over the past few days.

But, I just finished sending a facebook message to my friend, Sarah, who is coming to our show in Wautoma this Saturday. And before I knew it, I found myself rereading the entire message history between me and Sarah going all the way back to January 2006. There were all sorts of inside jokes about which I had forgotten and countless reminders of why we were such great friends. I'm sure some of you have had similar experiences. It's a weird thing, seeing all that you've shared with a really close friend through many years.

Sarah was the friend in whom I confided everything during the long, arduous process of auditioning for Barrage. She was there in the very beginning, when I first sent in my e-mail of interest. She took my very first headshots. She helped me draft e-mails to the managers. She spent countless hours with me and my parents discussing the what-ifs of auditioning for or joining Barrage. 

Sarah, simply and selflessly, did the most important thing a friend can do: invest.

Quite poetically, the first show Sarah will get to see is my second to last. She was there in the beginning, and six years later, she'll be here at the end.

This is when the Sehnsucht started. And whenever I think of Sehnsucht, I instantly think of my English class during my senior year of high school, when I first learned the term which I understand to mean an intense yearning or longing for the past. I haven't written much about my time in high school on this blog, but suffice it to say that I loved high school. A lot. Many of my best friends today were in that English class. Coincidentally, the word Sehnsucht has become so inextricably tied to memories of high school that even thinking of it in passing often triggers its onset.

Then, I started browsing my facebook news feed and saw photos of today's graduation ceremonies at ASU.

...as if this afternoon hadn't already become heavy enough! 

When I started this entry, I wasn't really sure why I was writing or where I was going. I merely felt compelled to write. I now realize I needed to capture this odd sense of longing that I'm somehow already feeling for a thing which has yet to cease.

Is there a German word for that, too? A pre-Sehnsucht Sehnsucht?

Five more shows.

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Ticking Clocks and Rising Locks

Two weeks from today, I'll wake up in my bedroom at home for the first time with Barrage in my past. (There it is, that looming sense of irreversible change!) Granted, there will be some corporate gigs and one-off events randomly in the summer and fall, but for all intents and purposes, I'll no longer be with my dream job.

I'm still a little bit scared/sad/anxious, but am mostly feeling excited about what the future holds. It's been an incredible four years.

But, I'll save the reflection for later. There are better things to share right now!

These past ten days on the road have been pretty unexpectedly awesome.


We've had some mind-blowingly beautiful drives. So beautiful that it hurts. I've sincerely felt this aching sensation to freeze time and attempt to memorize every last detail of the landscape in front of me. Perhaps that's melodramatic -- okay, objectively, I'll give you that -- but I do feel like it's a fairly accurate description. These photos of drives through Wyoming, Washington, Oregon, and Idaho do no justice:


This one is definitely from Wyoming.
Snoqualmie Pass, Washington
And then, as an added plus, I've had run-ins and day-long excursions with friends all over the state of Washington!

With Jenny in Spokane!
With JJ and Jenna, who drove up to spend the day in Yakima, WA!
Taqueria Los Primos in Yakima. Just as good as the best Mexican food I've found in Arizona!
Now this is what tacos should look like.
After talking with Audra and Whitney, two ASU friends who drove from Seattle to the show in Puyallup (pronounced pew-AL-up, with "AL" sounding like the man's name), we realized that my day off yesterday lined up with their day off. 

Perfect timing!

Touch pools at the Seattle Aquarium.
Octopus.
The diver fed the fish...
...and I high-fived him through the glass!
The octopus gives a really great hug.
If a jellyfish had a face, I think it'd look like this.
With Audra and Whitney outside the aquarium on a beautiful day in Seattle!
Latte art: a skull with crazy hair (?).
At the locks.
Starting with this photo, how a lock works in pictures.
(In real time, this probably took 15 minutes.)
Success!
Weirdly, life on the road is getting better than ever. With the end in sight, we're even more relaxed and it feels like we've all subconsciously committed to having a great time all the time.

Funny how a little tweak in perspective can change so much.


Two more weeks. Ten more shows. Good times ahead.

Saturday, April 14, 2012

On Growth

So, it's finally here: Barrage begins an extended hiatus on May 7th and all the players are moving onto new things.

Today is the first day of my last tour with this band, the beginning of the end.

It feels like both the first and last day of senior year. There's still excitement ahead, but it's all informed by looming, significant change. That moment when you wake up on the last day of your senior year and realize, whether you like it or not, that the chapter is nearly over and your life is about to become very different. Everything seems to become a distant memory, which you will refer to -- at first uncomfortably -- in the past tense. What were already weak memories dissolve into faint stories, reminiscent of things which may or may not have happened to you. (Or maybe they happened to your brother?) And suddenly, starting or finishing a story with "when I was a kid" or "when I was younger" seems to take on a whole new meaning.

And yet, this transition into what you'll view as "adulthood" weirdly overlaps with a burgeoning fervor to actually start your life. Time graciously pardons whatever teenage angst remains, and everything is new, fresh, and exciting. Talking about the future is no longer as theoretical as it once was -- you have begun to live it.

I'm eager to start this next chapter in my life and I'm reluctant for the current one to end. There are many things I will miss (and other things which I certainly won't), but I'm ready for the change.

After four years at Barrage University, I'm ready for graduation.

Nineteen shows left.

Here we go!

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

7 Weeks in 33 Pictures

Seven weeks have passed since I last posted on the blog.

When I first stopped to consider how this occurred, I didn't quite understand.

Then, when I began to think about all that has happened, it became exceedingly obvious to me why I haven't had time to post.

In the past seven weeks, I:

Took a day trip into Amsterdam and ate breakfast at our favorite pannenkoeken place, the unbelievably tiny Upstairs Pannenkoekenhuis. (Photo stolen from Charlie.)
Sat at one of four tables.
Heard violinist Frank Peter Zimmermann perform with the New York Philharmonic in the Concertgebouw. Zimmermann is a genius. Don't ever miss a chance to see him.
Saw these tic tacs in a Dutch gas station and felt ASU pride. Go Devils!
Said goodbye to Rabbit Hill and the Netherlands.
Found the dressing room at Fort Myers High School decorated for my birthday...
...and the bathroom, too! (Per usual, my mom had been hard at work.)
Received hilarious gifts from the orchestra, including a Pilates book and The Idiot's Guide to Great Buns & Thighs.
Took a quick weekend trip over four days off to visit my friends in Washington, D.C. We stopped by the White House...
...and then lucked into second row seats for a live taping of Jim Gaffigan. (It's possible my face may be on Comedy Central when his "Mr. Universe" special starts airing.)
Caught up with my old roommate from Killington, Phil, who has since stopped playing viola and is now at Georgetown Law.
Got a behind-the-scenes tour of 918 F Street, a new endeavor by LivingSocial, which was being run by one of my best friends from college!
Crashed at Matt's place and threw an Oscars dinner party for our surprisingly large group of ASU friends who now live in D.C.
Visited Emma at the Newseum...
...and took this panoramic photo from the balcony. (Click to see it larger. The Capitol is on the left.)
Celebrated my 25th birthday at my 4th Annual Birthday Breakfast with the band in Clearwater, FL...
...and then they buried me in the sand on the beach.
Heard a live salsa band in Tampa and had a hilarious time dancing with Kristina. (Note: don't ever not dance with Kristina -- she's the most fun partner you could ever have.)
Saw this frog outside of our hotel...and then watched as it hopped into a hotel room with a cracked-open door.
Finished a three month tour and flew to NYC to visit my friends Matt and Lies'l.
Heard Lies'l sing a solo in Carnegie Hall with Northern Arizona University's Shrine of the Ages Choir.
Went on a post-concert cruise around the New York Harbor and saw the Statue of Liberty for the first time.
Ate at Mandoo Bar, tried to memorialize it with a picture, and only ended up laughing.
Relaxed in Central Park.
Stumbled upon the Carl Fischer building.
Saw these awesome signs on the stairs and walls of some random, hipster-y hotel.
Squeezed into a bookstore to see and hear The Moth, which I listen to on podcast frequently.
Had breakfast with Annette...
...and strolled along The High Line on Manhattan's West Side, a public park built on an historic, elevated rail line.
Spent three days at home and was delighted to find that Ben tucked himself into my suitcase while I packed.
Stayed on the 38th floor of the Marriott in Atlanta for the American String Teachers Association 2012 National Conference, where Barrage gave the closing performance last Saturday night.
Spent my days working with students, attending sessions, jamming, meeting all sorts of interesting people, hearing some incredible performances, catching up with friends, and having an absolute blast!
And, I didn't even manage to take pictures of my second visit to The Wizarding World of Harry Potter in Orlando with Kristina and Tim!

Seven weeks. Thirty-three pictures. Done.